Today is graduation day. I want to say happy graduation to the high school seniors.

I also want to look at these two high school graduation photos. The one to the left was posted by the writer Luis Urrea on Twitter and his Facebook fan page. The one on the right was my high school graduation. We attended the same high school in San Diego, graduating a year apart–Luis in 1973 and me in 1972.

I don’t remember much of my high school graduation. I attended a large school with over 600 people in my graduating class, so I remember it being long and boring. I remember going to a party following the graduation either at my boyfriend’s house or in his neighborhood.

What I was struck with when I saw Luis’ photo (yes, he gave me permission to use it) is the joy and affection. There’s action and movement in the photo. The woman to the right definitely adds to the photo. Perhaps she’s looking into the future.

The photo of my boyfriend and I is serious. We’re not smiling. We’re not affectionate. There is no joy. Everyone in the background has their back to us. Although we’re looking into the camera (and at my father who didn’t approve of my boyfriend) we’re reticent and contracted. There’s no sense of our future. sadly, there is no joy. There’s just contraction.

I have reflected many times upon our rigid search. It has shown me that everything is illuminated in the light of the past. It is always along the side of us–on the inside looking out. Like you say–inside out.

In this way I will always be along the side of your life and you will always be along side of mine. Our families will be with us and our families’ families…

I am sending you this because we have shared something
to exist for and, of course, in case anyone comes searching.

The character Alex Perchov, Scene 24, Everything is Illuminated, film by Leiv Schreiber, based on the novel by Jonathon Safran Foer

I watched Everything is Illuminated again. It’s one of my favorite movies. About a young man who collects to have memories. He sets out to discover his grandfathers story when he finds an old photograph of his grandfather as a young man with a young woman. His search takes him and his translator and guide beyond what any of them expect. The magic of the story is illuminating.

This is my favorite photo of myself– the twirl of the umbrella framing me; the tilt of my head; and the colors are what makes it special. But what I like the most about it is the expression on my face. The look that doesn’t look posed. I wasn’t trying to please. I wasn’t trying to ham. I just was. Outside with my umbrella in summer. Dad took the picture, but I didn’t need to do anything special.

I’m still in the process of updating this site. It is going through transformation. The site began with the idea to be about looking at photos, but quickly digressed into a family history site for my extended family. This only lasted a short time, but I left everything up for nearly two years.

I’m now ready to proceed with developing the site into what I originally planned–Investigating the many ways to  get beyond the stories and seeing what’s really in family photos.